Saturday, January 23, 2010

Rogue Adoptee

The title is interesting, isn’t it . . . Rogue Adoptee.

All right, so maybe just to me it seems interesting, but I promise I have a very good reason why .

It’s the title for my oldest son’s new blog.

It’s another new step into the future he is building for himself. An early laid anchor in his desire to work with troubled teens and specialize in adoptee issues. To draw from his own experience and help others who will come to face what he has through his life.

To me, as the proud mom, I am already convinced, Rogue Adoptee, will be a blog of great brilliance. A MUST read for everyone because of the wisdom and insight that the writer will share in his experiences, thoughts, and journey as an adoptee.

But there is also that protective streak that I battle with as well. That part of me that wants to stand up and be the wall between my oldest son and the ugliness he is sure to face in his quest to speak out for what he believes in.

Because, as he warns from the very beginning, his blog is going to be one that challenges thoughts and ideas from ALL sides of adoption. In his new found confidence, he has found his right to speak out about what he believes in, what he experiences, without allowing restrictions to fall upon him.

Restrictions that have the risk of coming from both first families and adoptive families. From his understanding that both sides have very strong, deep-rooted beliefs in the truth of adoption.

But if he is brave enough to walk this path, then I have to be brave enough to give him the freedom that he has every right to as an adult. To do so without his mother putting up obstacles to protect him.

It’s one of those lessons we learn as we parent. The very real fact that we have to see and respect our children as they become adults. Allow them to have their voices, their thoughts, their feelings, without fear that anyone, especially their parents, might try to come in and silence them for whatever reason . . .

Even if that reason is protection.

And in the truth of it all, outside that natural knee-jerk reaction to protect my child from any ugliness or cruelty he might face, there is more to what I see and feel.

Because in his blog, in his belief and desire for the direction he wants, Rogue Adoptee, to take, I see a strong, confident man who believes in himself and his fight enough to speak out even at risk of upsetting others.

Who sits between two lives, as so many adoptees do, but refuses to let that restrict him on ANY side. Refuses to be held back from expressing his views, his thoughts, his experiences as an adoptee.

Because my son is strong enough, brave enough, confident enough, that he will speak his mind. He will challenge the thoughts of, not only strangers, but those closest to him as well, to finally have a voice to be heard. A voice he does not fear reaction to because he knows that the one person he must always be honest to is himself.

And so it is with the greatest of a mother’s pride that I introduce you to the next great blog in the adoption world . . . Rogue Adoptee.

It is with trust and belief in my son’s strength and confidence that I encourage all to hear his words, his beliefs, even if they may challenge your own.

Because I believe in him, his words, and in the fact that, although I may not always be able to protect him as I want, I will always be proud of him for standing up for what he believes in and understanding that his voice needs to be heard, HAS to be heard. And nobody ever has the right to take that away from him.


  1. It also mentions that he is the "experiment" of an open adoption.

    He is the first adoptee that I have seen to share his truths about the open adoption experiment from the adopted adult perspective. This alone will intrigue many people.

  2. i read his blog. all i can say after reading his last post is ... wow ... i wish my son was as willing to talk about everything as he seems to be.

    i'm in reunion for over 5 yrs and we've never really talked about it ... talk about the "elephant" in the room when we're together.

    you should be very proud of him ... and i'm sure that you are!

    i will be following his blog, and can't wait to see more of his perspective.

  3. Hi Cassi,

    He sure has been thorugh a lot and his voice will be a great addition to the world.

    Hope he doesn't mind me placing a link :)

    Myst xxx