You know, it always comes at us . . . the ones who dare to speak out about adoption in contrast to the “rosy” light it is portrayed in. We are negative. Just taking one personal bad experience, our own, and generalizing all adoptions that way.
How could we?
Why would we dare to say anything that wasn’t happy and good about adoption?
We are the evil ones. Those of us who have suffered such great loss. We are terrible monsters, speaking up in such a “negative” way. Painting adoption in a different light than the great, amazing act it supposively is.
We are the ones who need to be silenced.
They travel our way from their own stories of how great and amazing adoption is. Visit our words, our stories, our blogs, to tell us how we are wrong for our own feelings and experiences. Label us with the ever so popular “negative” button that diminishes our very real truths, places us in a lower category than their own experience that is so happy. So fulfilling. So amazing because of how much they have gained through adoption.
And the rest of us . . . we’re the bad ones. The ones who are doing wrong by sharing our sides, our opinions, our very real experiences.
We need to sit down and shut up. We need to realize that there are so many out there who have gained through adoption and be aware of their happiness while they want to silence our sorrow.
We are wrong.
Just as we have been from the first moment of conception.
We are the ones who need to step back and say nothing, because we didn’t have a voice before. Why should we have it now?
Why should anyone care or want to listen about those of us that have hurt and suffered at the hands of adoption?
Why should that make a difference when there are so many out there who have gained and seen such wonderful results?
Our pain, our loss, our complete denial of help and support when we needed it most, doesn’t matter in the least bit when it comes to making sure adoption is still seen in the great “happy” light as it always has been.
And be damned if what we went through is enough to fight for changes. To actually see the true light of how adoption has harmed so many. Our stories don’t matter. They don’t need to be heard. Because all we are doing is being unfair to the many who have gained through adoption and they are the ones who matter. The ones society wants to listen to.
Why the hell should we make changes just because people have been, and still are, hurt by the process of adoption. That fact doesn’t matter, right?
And why should it when it’s the gain of others that dictate the process.
Because really, why should anything be changed that causes such drastic pain and loss. That brings about severe loss and grief to the point that some have taken their own lives, believed that not living was better than existing day to day with the constant reality that is adoption.
Those people are unimportant when it comes to the grand scheme of things. Their stories, their heartache, really doesn’t matter because what is most important is keeping adoption in a good light.
Sure we might lose some wonderful people. And, of course, there are those who will suffer and grieve their entire lives. But really, what are they and their lives worth in the glorious picture of adoption?
Why even consider changing anything when obviously, the lives of those who have been affected mean so little to those who can wake up every morning thankful for how adoption has, and will, bless their own, deserving and amazing life?
Wordless Wednesday — Walk This Way
1 day ago